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FINAL QUALIFIERS FOR TRUE
WISCONSINITE STATUS
We are an honorable people and trust you will be
forthright in your self assessment:
50% score or higher needed
to attain The Bachelor of Cheese degree.
A score of 80%
or above earns the distinguished Master's of Cheddar
degree.
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You
can taste a difference in cheese made somewhere else.
You
own at least one tie with a or piece of jewelry with a Green Bay
Packer theme.
You can find and pronounce : Eau Claire,
Oconomowoc, Menomonee Falls, Waukesha, and La Crosse, Fond du Lac.
You
know what "bubbler" means and can point quickly to the location of
the closest one.
At least one of your family members works /
worked in a cheese factory.
A Holstein cow outside of
Wisconsin
makes you miss home.
You can taste the difference between
apples grown up north and the ones that you can buy in the south.
When talking about the Green Bay Packers you refer to them
as "we".
When the weather hits "0" degrees you decide
that maybe it's time to get out a jacket instead of a sweatshirt.
The family gets together every week for fish fry at the
local pub.
You know what a brat is, and they're at every
outdoor event that your family has ever had.
You know how to
make a very good sled out of normal household items.
You
love your outdoor pool because of how it doubles as an ice skating
area during the winter.
You have watched
Fargo
and not noticed an accent.
You drive around with the air
conditioning on until it hits 30 degrees, because it just was so
darn hot outside.
The local paper needs 6 pages to cover the
Packers... in July!
Your best shirt has a big letter G on
it.
You think it's nice enough to swim when the temperature
hits 50.
You family owns a "winter car" while the "good one"
sits in the garage from Nov-Apr.
Your put ketchup on a
charcoal grilled NY strip steak.
You think everyone from
south of Madison
has an accent.
You can identify a
Michigan
accent.
Down South to you means
Chicago.
You
can make sense out of the words "upnort" and "Trivers".
You
consider Madison
exotic.
You can visit Luxemburg,
Holland,
Belgium,
Denmark,
Berlin,
New London & Poland all in one afternoon.
You can
recognize someone from Illinois
from their driving.
You buy cat litter every winter, but you
don't own a cat.
At least twice a year, the kitchen doubles
as a meat processing plant or cannery.
You don't have a
coughing fit from one sip of Pabst Blue Ribbon.
You're
a member of the Polar Bear Club and proud of it.
You can use
the word "ya der hey" easily in a sentence.
You hear someone
use the words "uff-dah" and you don't immediately break into
uncontrollable laughter.
Your whole family wears green and
gold to church on Sunday.
Your idea of creative landscaping
is a statue of a cow next to your blue spruce.
You know how
to polka.
You know what a FIB is and can spot them a mile
away.
You think of the major four food groups as cheese,
beer, brats and Jell-O salad with marshmallows.
FFA was the
most popular club in high school.
You have eaten a cow pie
at the State Fair.
There was at least one kid in your class
who had to help milk cows in the morning .
Country Kitchen is
the place to meet after the party.
You have ever seen or
played in a "broom ball" game.
You have ever partied at
Summerfest, Festa Italiana, German Fest, Irish Fest, Oktoberfest, or
all of the above.
You or someone you know was a "Dairy
Princess" at a county fair.
You can't be friends with a
Vikings fan.
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